Yoga Class Thoughts: “I’m Hot, I’m Lost, Where the F*ck Does My Foot Go?” (And Other Sacred Truths We Don’t Admit)
You Came for Zen, You Got Brain Chaos
Yoga is marketed as this chill, peaceful, float-away-on-a-cloud experience.
But let’s be real for a second.
If you’ve ever sat on your mat and thought:
“I’m hot.”
“I have no idea what’s going on.”
“Where the f*ck does my foot go?”
“I want water. I want snacks. I want out.”
You’re not alone.
The truth is, yoga is just as much about surviving your own mind as it is about stretching.
Let’s take a brutally honest look at what’s actually happening inside most of our heads during yoga class.
Inside My Head at Yoga (And Yours Too, Don’t Lie)
Act 1: Arrival Chaos
“Oh god, everyone already has their mats down. Where do I go? Not too close to the teacher. Not in the front. Not in the back. F*ck, I’ll just sit here.”
“Did I forget deodorant? Great.”
Act 2: Warm-Up? Already Struggling.
“Okay, just breathe. This is fine.”
“Wait, is this my left or right hand?”
“She said what? Chaturanga? That’s not even a word.”
“I’m definitely sweating more than everyone else.”
“Why did I wear these pants?”
Act 3: The Advanced Pose Meltdown
“No f*cking way am I doing that.”
“I’m hot.”
“I want water.”
“How is she doing a headstand? I want to kick her over.”
“What’s that bird doing outside? Lucky.”
“Ooooh, I like this song.”
“Wait, back to what? What pose are we in now?”
The Chitta Vrittis: It’s Not Just You, It’s Your Brain
All those chaotic thoughts?
That’s called the Chitta Vrittis—the fluctuations of your mind.
Yoga isn’t about getting rid of them.
It’s about watching them—and not letting them own you.
You don’t need to fight your thoughts.
You just don’t have to believe them all.
Release Your Ego, Not Your Personality
Here’s the secret:
Yoga isn’t about being silent, still, or perfect.
It’s about working with yourself, not against yourself.
Can’t do that pose? Cool.
Need to rest? Do it.
Want to laugh mid-class? Even better.
This practice is yours.
Messy thoughts, sweat, eye-rolls, and all.
Come Be a Hot Mess With Me
If your brain won’t shut up during yoga, you’re in good company.
Let’s move, breathe, and embrace the chaos together.
Join my next trauma-informed yoga class—no pressure, no perfection, no BS.
Just show up. Let the thoughts come. Move through it.